Motivation. Focus. Productivity.
All of the above have been sadly lacking in my life lately.
As some of you already know, June 2009 has been one of the most difficult months of my life. Nobody’s died (yet) , and I’m still married, but other than that, it’s been a perfect storm of setbacks and disasters, on multiple fronts.
I’m not going to bore you with all the details. E-mail me if you’re a glutton for punishment. Suffice it to say, in the words of Ned Racine in BODY HEAT: “Sometimes the shit comes down so heavy I feel like I should wear a hat.”
As a fellow ‘Rati noted to me a few days ago, I’ve been under the radar lately. That’s because while this has gone on, I’ve barely had the energy to get out the things that absolutely have to get done. In the writing side of my life, that’s been the newspaper column and the Murderati posts. Fortunately, I already had some fragments and notes that could be turned into finished work without too much trouble. Otherwise, I don’t know if I’d have been able to do it. As for the current WIP: fugeddaboudit. Sunday was the first time I’d opened the damn thing up in weeks, and it looked like the work of a stranger. Not a particularly talented one at that.
But this isn’t a “poor poor pitiful me” sob story. Because I can report that things, for the moment, are looking a little brighter. Family and friends have rallied to offer help, both practical and spiritual. I’ve gotten great advice, encouragment, and career help from fellow writers and from readers. All of it’s been offered freely, without my even asking.
I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
I’ve made some changes and some new beginnings. And I have started back to work on LAWYERS, GUNS AND MONEY again. We’re not out of the woods yet, but I’m beginning to see some glimmers of daylight.
Which brings me, finally, to my point. Sometimes the shit does come down so heavy, you feel like you need a hat. But you’re not alone. Somebody else has probably been through it. You may feel like no one else has ever felt the way you do. You may feel, as I did, like just giving up and letting the water take you down. But let me say it again: you’re not alone. And no storm lasts forever. If I can get through it, you can get through it. With a little help from your friends.