Be warned. Whenever you see a blog post of mine that has the word RANDOM in it, that means I have absolutely no fucking idea what to write about. Usually I can slog through and come up with something at least a notch above coma-inducing, but today I'm stumped.
I know, I probably shouldn't admit that. But it's the eve of a new year and maybe if I'm honest at least one day out of the 365, I won't burn in Hell.
HA. Dream on, Rob.
Speaking of new years…
I went to sleep last night and when I woke up this morning an entire freakin' year had passed.
How exactly did that happen?
I was planning to do a "best of" for the year 2008 today, but the problem is that I can barely remember 2008. Of course, I can barely remember what I had for dinner last night, so that tells you something about me.
But, seriously, where the hell did 2008 go? Or 2007 for that matter.
I can remember 2005 very clearly. That's when I got my first publishing deal. And a few weeks later, when I spoke to my editor, he told me the release date for KISS HER GOODBYE would be February of 2007.
And I gotta tell you, it took forfuckingever for that particular month and year to roll around. I grew to be a very crotchety old man in that time. My kids grew up and their kids grew up and their kids' kids — oh, you get the point. I waited several lifetimes for KHG to be released.
But get this.
Because of scheduling conflicts, by the time my second book (WHISPER IN THE DARK) comes out, an entire TWO YEARS will have passed since the release of the first one.
Yet those two years seem to be a mere blip on calendar.
Again, I say, WTF?
(That is, by the way, an actual question. So please include your answer to WTF? in your comments below.)
The Power of Validation
I have been struggling, struggling, struggling with my fourth book, which is tentatively titled DOWN AMONG THE DEAD MEN.
This one has truly been killing me. Almost as much as the second one did.
Which is why it's been very nice to have validation of that second book. After great reviews in the UK, I just got my Publisher's Weekly review for WHISPER IN THE DARK and there's a nice little red star next to it.
Now, I've gotta tell you, getting a starred review from PW has made my year. Ask anybody. Really. I can't stop talking about it. I've grown even more obnoxious than I was before, if that's possible (shut up, Brett. You, too, Bill).
But having that little bit of validation has done a wonderful thing for me. Suddenly the new book is going like gangbusters. Words, paragraphs, pages, chapters are flying out from under my fingers. And I know I shouldn't say this either, but they're pretty damn good.
PW has given me a much needed kick in the ass and for the first time I'm actually WANTING to work on the book. It took me forever to get here, but here I am. Eee-haaa.
And On a Totally Unrelated Note…
When you're writing a sex scene, what word, if any, do you use for penis? What about vagina?
I could give you a twenty page list of slang terms for each, but somehow none of those terms seems appropriate. When I come across such words in a scene, I can't help but start laughing. They just take me right out of the story.
Sure, you can actually use the words penis and vagina, but those have to be about the two most clinical, unsexy words in the world. So, tell me, what's a good substitute?
His burning hammer of love?
Her forbidden cove?
Seriously, how does one write this shit without pitching a giggle fit?
And on that note…
I'm outta here. Sorry for the suckfest, random or otherwise. There's a new year coming, so go out and celebrate it and I promise to do better in 2009……..
Uh-huh. Sure, Rob.